Rocking Out pt2

1L2U,
Prov!?

JobBlog: Welcome to Bollywood!

Thursday 9/04 10am
We had a meeting on the same floor as Human Resources (Bad sign #1). In the conference room are HR reps (Bad sign #2) and the Director of Operations (This can't be a good sign #3). Bomb drops: globally Customer Service is being restructured with E-helpdesk moving to St. Louis while Invoicing and Contract Management (my department) will be now handled in India. Shock filled the room, sighs and gasps are heard in the air. I smiled, trying hard not to jump out the seat and do a TD celebration. I chuckled because I had a feeling my job was in trouble. See, anytime I really hated a job, in due time I'm no longer there. So said. So done.

All of this will happen by the end of May so we have nine months to find other forms of employment. Two of my co-workers will be forced into retirement. My manager doesn't know because they didn't want to ruin his vacation. This should be fun

We later meet with reps to discuss the usual: severance package, COBRA, benefits, etc. Package is a joke: two weeks for each year you worked and you get a bonus if you stay after January. I will get six weeks in a lump sum, of course taxes will be taken out. I scheme.

One of my co-workers was extremely pissed off because he has been busting his ass on this job. Like dude would come to work on the weekends or when it was supposed to be his day off. Though I admired his hard work, I always wanted to tell him not to do that because, in my experience, your hard work don't mean shit. It's all about networking. He talked about hustling, which wouldn't surprise me because he's street. Like he's the real life G to Gent. I can see this being a turning point, you know like in the movies when the con comes out and tries to do good only to have it blow up in his face.

Funny thing, this was after my dude gave me breakfast (ie my week supply of herbals).

My co-worker lamented over this. His wedding is going to put on hold. He's on his own and this is bad timing. Blah blah blah. I do not want to appear mean, but sometimes I feel he says these things to show how he's the true definition of the American Dream and pulling yourself up by the straps. There's an ego there that I'm not feeling. He can't eat or think. I tell him to eat something because stressing isn't going change things and the company already showed how much they care. Also suggest he goes to the park to clear his mind.

No work gets done. Global email is sent. Phone calls and emails come through, some with sympathy, some with anger. I get a feeling we're going to be getting this for the next couple of days. I contemplate putting the out of office on. We take up the offer to leave after meeting with the HR rep. I mean...work isn't getting done after that bombshell so why stay?

I "ate" my breakfast and drink some beer when I got home, patiently waiting for the Giants/Skins NFL Kickoff Game. World Champion Jints wins. Today was a good day.

Friday 9/05 10:30am
We have a career seminar. I feel like I've heard of this before because the only thing I got away from it was there's money in IT. Some people feel a little bit better; the jedi mind trick worked.

11:45am
Manager of E-Helpdesk comes and gives us the don't worry speech. Fifteen minutes later, one of my co-workers responds with this link in the email: http://money.cnn.com/2008/09/05/news/economy/jobs_august/index.htm?eref=rss_topstories

2:00pm
I get an email from one of the account managers asking (well more like pestering) about the status of a contract. Not shocked, the AM never acknowledge the recent news. I feel...kinda pissed, but that quickly is replaced with "In nine months, I won't have to deal with yall. PRAISE JAH!". A smile came on my face.

Interestingly enough...
...I did more work today than I've done since...since...well shit since I came back from vacation two weeks ago

Saturday 9/06
Couple of thoughts:
-Are we still going to the Customer Service Appreciation Luncheon? I mean we were so appreciated they are relocation us to India.
-Same thing goes for the team-building activity planned for Oct
-Add the Holiday party to that list
-Do we keep working to have a good end-of-the-year review? What's the point? Our jobs are going to India. Raise? Ha! WE'RE GOING TO INDIA!
-I'm going to ask my manager if we still need to meet every two weeks. I mean what's the point? We're losing our jobs.

Amends "Don't Get Fired Before May" plan with "So I Can Get Some Laughs Because It's Going To Be An Interesting Nine Months"

...say wha?

First: HIYA! I missed you too (whoever you may be)

Second:

Third (the main topic): I was at a cookout and met a dude who was part of a crew that had a couple of hits. Not sure if the crew is together because the main member decided to be in Miami than in New York. We got to talking and he asked if I DJ'ed, which I kinda do if you like amateur shit. I told him I did beats, but mainly for hobby. Basically he was looking for a new direction so he asked who I listened to. I ran down the list and got...

"Nah never heard of them"

Them = Dilla, Waajeed, Little Brother, Dwele, Flying Lotus, Wale, J'Davey, Little Dragon

Me = :-(

Then it hit me...even if you're in the industry, you do not know who is out there unless their songs are pimped to Viacom or Clear Channel. Even more shocking was that his crew hung with underground cats for a while.

Being the person that I am, I played him some Dilla.

"This is hot. How many records did he sell?"

:-( * 2

I kinda want to lead him to the goodness that is Left of Center, but the people I like do not make money. This road will get him props, but no ends. This road will have him on the road for a long stretch of time with little cash coming in. C.R.E.A.M. is real, yo and he proved it to me.

Jeez...
Maybe heads were right..."You like them niggas that are broke and struggling."
Birds of a feather...

What does Obama and Big Prov have in common?

IT'S OUR BIRTHDAY!

FINALLY...someone I could be geeked to say was on born on my day, other than Robert "Iceberg Slim" Beck (happy bday, pimp)

And yes at 36 I still get hyped over small things like that.

Eff you, it's my day

(AND FOOTBALL CAME BACK ON SUNDAY! It was like seeing your girl on winter break...)

Top Three Ponderings of Today

1. "Live now reminisce later"
2. Now I remember why I stop going there.
3. "This shit has got to stop"---Goodie Mob

Here I Go Again 4

"Plus this is keeping smart women like me off of the poles. Weed is so en vogue right now, people turn their heads or give you a slap on the wrist. Remember when mentioning stripping became cool? All of a sudden middle age women want to stripercise and give lap dances to their flabby ass husbands who don't want them anyway cause they lust after young girls with big firm tits and a tight wet vagina. That's how weed is at this moment. It's the moonshine of the millennium..."

This hasn't been a good 35th year...

Mainly because I keep saying I'm 36 (that's not until August 4th). So of course you start thinking "Four more years til 40. What do you have to show for it?"

And the answer comes back: Nothing.

Now THIS is probably how folks approaching 30 feel and I should be thinking "It ain't that bad". Then you look around. "It really is that bad."

-no real prospects. Those that were are boo'd up, pregnant, or something
-when people ask me what's new, I respond "Remember how it was the last time we've talked? It's the same."
-got placed on probation because honestly I was pissed at how we are treated every year so I slacked off
-directionless
-at times I feel lonely
-at times I am alone
-I've been in the past waaaaaay too much. I'm wishing there was a time machine or somehow granted special time controlling powers so I could tell my former self "Nigga, go away for college. This rap thing isn't gonna happen" or "You should have never went full time so soon and left the library five years earlier" or "Maybe you should have networked better."
-I think I've geeked out too hard this year

So if you've been wondering why I haven't been out and about, those are some of the reasons why. Like what do I have to offer? Do these people who I call friends, that? Have I pushed my friends away?

"...like my father..." © Prince, "When Doves Cry"

Bah, I need to let that one go.

I don't know.

I'll probably get out of this funk soon...









I hope...







Inshallah...
(and no I'm not suicidal (just wanted to put that out there)).